Friday, November 25, 2011

Single, ready to mingle?

Most all of us, regardless of our own relationship status, know someone who is single. Perhaps they've never married, they could be divorced or widowed, any number of situations. Even at the young age of 36, I have more than a handful of friends who have been widowed. They've endured accidents, cancer, war, and other various tragedies. Regardless of the reason, dating today is not the same as it was 15-20 years ago, and it's difficult to know where to even begin!

I have one friend that I speak with regularly online who has been divorced for several years. She has children, doesn't want to go to any nighttime establishments, and attends her childhood church that doesn't have any single men in her age group. She doesn't want to leave a church she loves just to meet a man, and isn't really comfortable dating any of the single dads on her kids sports teams. We were laughing last week about the latest celebrity dating news site news that we had both read, and she made the remark that celebrities have it so easy. I disagree because I think they have added pressure of wondering if someone likes them for who they actually are, or for who people think they are, but that's beside the point.

One of the churches in her area had a denomination wide singles dating night, but she didn't feel comfortable going alone. She said it just felt too set up and forced. She doesn't have the extra money to afford the dating sites you see advertised around, so she's considering setting up a profile on one of the free online dating sites, just to try it out. She'd rather have a profile and seek someone she feels like she has something in common with, versus being sought out. I've never created a profile on any of the sites, so I have no idea how it actually works or what information you have access to.

How about y'all? Are you single (for whatever reason) now or have you been single recently? Any advice for my friend or any other readers who might be facing this dilemma? I think singles tend to ponder this issue more around the holidays, specifically the New Year, when they are looking for a fresh start!

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